The Mental Wealth Trialogue was held on 6 September, attended by 21 people. 14 of these indicated they had lived experience, 5 identified as carers, 16 as professionals and 5 as having a public interest.
Part 1 : What is recovery and what does it mean to you?
Having freedom and taking responsibility for my actions
It’s a non-linear journey
Snakes and ladders, you go up in mood and something happens and you come down again
Not comparing your situation to others
Relapse happens, it’s a dynamic process not a destination, it’s not black and white
An increased skill set, becoming more recovered over time overall
To develop a flourishing life
A sense of wellbeing
Long term functional management of life when difficulties happen
Increased resilience
Not needing as much support or direction from services
Services say ‘your disordered and we don’t like your behaviour’
Sometimes skills don’t come back, with an acquired brain injury for example
You have to find new ways of doing things
Being less isolated and more connected to people
Being seen, showing up regardless
A growing sense of gratitude for life
A sense of others acknowledging others, compassion for empathy for others, wanting to serve
we would query if anyone ever gets recovered
Recovery is a big challenge
Society put you on pathways to make you better is this always the right path for you?
Is individual to everybody
The biomedical model tends to disorder because of a broken brain, this suggests that fixing the chemistry would be OK, that recovery is about coming back to the original state.
With mental health problems you can never get back you can’t return
The word is a little misleading, recovery
Increased capacity for flourishing life
Becoming a better person, going forward in a better state
As you recover if you discover things about yourself
Changing the body posture can change your emotions
We are always a work in progress
If you have a cup of poison and keep adding water then eventually it becomes water
Gratitude and acceptance
Mindfulness rather than focusing on gaps which makes us upset to the exclusion of all that might dilute it, we should not pretend it doesn’t exist but perhaps focus on what does make us feel better
How much strength it can take others to just survive the trials they have experienced in life
Learning to look after yourself better
Recovery is scary, not always good with emotions we change our state for example with alcohol
Sometimes we can only do it minute by minute
How understanding people can be.
Lateral thinking how to be more creative in life
Look for little points of goodness and focus on these
Pick self up and be kind to self more to move forward
Not always believing your thoughts but to move into your body, grounding and absorbed in activities which lead to achievement, this builds resilience
We often stop doing those things that help us when we feel unwell and really we should do these things more
Too much time thinking
Developmental trauma is huge and how we lives in the body today leads to vulnerable terrified children within many of us
We often push down and ignore and harm this child
There are good people in the world and some people can be trusted
Have learnt a lot of skills that others can find useful
These tools can help others and is a positive things to come out of difficulties
we need to teach our children to become emotionally literate
Our emotions affect our thought processes
Learn to forgive and move on not to be held hostage to the past
Cut the emotional cord to patients
Radical acceptance, parents do the best they can mostly we need to have compassion for them
Part 2: How do we get ourselves well again and keep well?
Managing stress, think of self as a jenga block, challenges knock blocks out so we do things that put blocks back in
It’s hard work, learning to look after yourself better
Learning to be with the dark stuff
Sometimes we have to have others to help
Recognise struggles and think how you used to do things
Figure out who you are
Get rid of fantasy that all problems will go away if I did one thing, it’s a mix
Be careful of drugs and alcohol and medication
Appreciate the polarity of acceptance
The radical quality of action
Keep topping up your Wellness, have a flake moment, a little bit of nice for yourself, realise this is selfish. It’s essential
Need to work hard at it just as we would with physical health
Practice things as we would in a course of physiotherapy
Self soothe boxes
Realizing there aren’t just black and whites
On picking thoughts to help find our national bits, challenge yourself
Pace yourself and be realistic.
Have realistic expectations of yourself
Watch classic comedies at least once a week to keep the spirits up
Have a laugh
Take negatives as you take positives, finds the positive from the negative on reflection
Connect with different people
Yoga and massage, these help process your mind
What we feel stays in our bodies we somatise for example of when stressed
Figure out what way he works for us
We often criticise ourselves, ask would I talk to her friend like that?
To fit into society’s expectations, difference is not always excepted. Regardless find what makes you happy and do it, as long as it’s legal
Being you, you’re the best one of you
Find the joyful moments in your life
We are a work in progress, this is comforting
The text each other three or four things that your grateful for
Speak the truth your own truth
Being aware of something that’s bigger than me
A sense of connection and presence
Change of perspective, grateful for the small things
Trusting others to recover, holding the vision for them when they can’t
Lots of places are starting recovery and well-being cafes and so on
The importance of being independent, yes it’s important but also interdependence is important.
Independence can make you feel very lonely and isolated
If human beings are social animals
Community needs to be are healing force
What’s could you put in a self-soothe box?
Tattoos and jewellery
Rescue remedy
A ripple
Bubble bath
Cuddly toy
To be a complete person we need to be able to be empathetic and not be entirely autonomous
I might be afraid as I’m not in danger I have resources and can set boundaries
Freedom to do good, fraternity, just be a good person
Strive to be a better person and think about the retribution consequences
Connection to animals, they can be very intuitive
Also get into nature
Connection belonging nurture security
Questions for next time:
How do we engage with mental Health Services?
What’s been helpful and what’s been challenging? Our act