Online – August 2020

This Mental Wealth Trialogue event was the second virtual one to take place, on 19 August, as part of the Mental Wealth Academy online pilot funded by the National Emergencies Trust. Nine people attended. Artwork is by Claire Holloway, inspired by themes brought up in the discussion.

Question: How can we be more compassionate to ourselves and others in dealing with loneliness?

Sense of tenderness, accepting loneliness and meeting it with tenderness

Just reach out

Ease their loneliness, phoning them or sending cards

I’m extremely vulnerable

Sympathy not enough, don’t do anything about it

Lack of physical contact is very hard, although I do a lot of zoom it’s not a substitute for that personal contact

Find an excuse to make contact with people, feel the urge to talk to strangers

A lot of people feel like that, only too glad to reciprocate

Also felt a lot a anxiety, never felt this before, don’t beat yourself up for being anxious

Accepting anxiety current circumstance raised  anxiety never felt before

Important to forgive ourselves be compassionate

Compassion has grown for the older generation who were usually housebound.  Here there is a realisation regarding the loneliness that this situation has highlighted

The new pace of life

Society has become more aware regarding mental ill health and it has heightened social problems

Anxiety is raised whilst wondering what the situation is now

It is now easier to meet family by anxieties are raised by going out

We are no longer in the same boat.  Maybe loneliness is now more acute for some

The first step can be the hardest

Compassion is needed not only for ourselves but also for others, it shows itself in the new politeness.  Making way for others, greeting each other and talking in the queue are all more commonplace

Smiling is very important although masked by masks

People still seem to be taking things a little bit slower

Are there things we can do to help include people?

Compassion

Exercise groups in Parks, the experience of meeting people again was lovely

Being compassionate to others increases wellbeing

It has always been an issue trying to reach people who are isolated, how to contact these people is a bigger question now.

The increase in anxiety  means they’re more likely to stay at home, is there a way of connecting with people?

Some just can’t  use the Internet so word of mouth becomes important
Some volunteers Phone  isolated people because those people have made themselves known

Is this down to being neighbourly?

Several neighbourhood apps have become available encouraging us to call and others to check in

It is better to check than not, leaving the door open

For those anxious about going out online is still best.  Was being able to see faces on zoom e.g.  Is helpful

Face to face contact

Compassion to ourselves is to notice our feelings

Using tools we have learned, being open about it and community spirit that didn’t work before

Self-Compassion can show in a willingness to ask for help when we need it this can be hard when it see you then usually helps others.

Dreadingwinter when going out isn’t so easy

Faith groups also have been wonderful

We are now in training for winter


Next question:
How can we remain positive in light of the uncertain future that we face?